hope – The Weary Worrier

Self esteem

Make your bed (you will want to lie in it)

admin

I read somewhere that it was important for a Buddhist monk to make his bed when he arose from his sleep. At the time I thought it was because this activity kept the strict regimentation of the monk’s life of study and service. I was correct in a way, but not fully.Arising from sleep and waking […]

Self esteem

Fear of feeling

admin

You know that things are about to change and that they will never be the same again. But what does that mean? How will I feel? Does my body dictate how I feel or does my mind? Messages from my body are sent to my brain and I know that those messages are translated there […]

Self esteem

The Waiting (is the worst)

admin

So all the information is here. All the forward actions are decided on and in place. All the bruises are healed and outwardly everything is ‘normal’. Anyone seeing me walking down the street, sitting at my desk at work…normal. Nothing to see here. But they would be unaware of the chemicals rushing through my body. […]

Self esteem

First Draft

admin

So the letter arrived. I was expecting it although without urgency because so many had arrived with benign content. Letters to be filed in my ‘Health Folder’ when I got the chance. So I didn’t open it straight away and it was on my table threatening to hide amongst the credit card invoices and bank […]

Gratitude

Abundance

admin

My life is full already, I feel old and full of doubt. I’m full of worrying discord, I feel frail and plagued with doubt. I’m full of negative emotion, On my daily wheel of derision. My life is full already, But there is a chink of light. Move over all that baggage, I see there’s […]

Gratitude

Isolation

admin

Doesn’t she know this is serious? Stupid woman, we’re all in isolation you know and I am particularly ill! Have been for weeks, yet every day she’s out there, on the green, right outside my sickbay. 9.00am on the dot she arrives, ridiculous routine…silently removing her coat, placing it ceremoniously on the grass like some sort […]